JOKES !!! XD

ppl !!!

TELL SOME JOKES !!!

i want to laugh till i die!!!

XD

i know many jokes but it would be hard write in english =/, becouse i don't know how to translate some words

Oh I know one!(This may not be as funny as when it happened but yeah)

Okay here goes.

When I was in school, my friend was scolded by a teacher. Then when the teacher was walking away, she was muttering, "fuc* him, f*ck him, fu*k him" and when the principal was walking past her, she said, "fu.... Oh hi sir!"

I lmao really badly at that time.

Oh and I have another one! There were 3 boys who was walking out of their house.

The first boy said, "Hey I forgot something! I need to go back to the house"

Then the second boy said, "Hey me too!"

As they both went to the house(all 3 of them live in the same house), they touched the water and stood on it as if they could walk on water. As the third boy grew jealous of what he thought were their powers, he wanted to try too.

So when he started to walk on the water, he immediately drowned.

Then the second boy said, "Maybe we should tell him the rock formations in the water"

The Wrong Way

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his cell phone rang.

Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there''s a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!"

"It's not just one car," said Herman, "It's hundreds of them!"

I got all of these jokes from www.jokes.comedycentral.com

the world trade center... a plane just flew inside...

on the top of the building a man stands and sings: "i believe i can fly~"
somwhere at the center of the building another man starts to sing: "i still burn like the sun~"
at the bottom in front o the building another one sings: "its raining men; halleluya~"


yes its mean XD

I don't get what your trying to say.

its a joke... ö.ö;;

you know... the world trade center??? the twin towers?? 9/11 ??

Oh, that "world trading center."

yessssssssss

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.
Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

can someone explain to me this joke:

chuck norris doesnt believe in germany

?????

whats green and fast and turns red after some while???

Spoiler:

traffic light?
____________________

Whats black and blue and says OW?

AiKirikaX wrote:can someone explain to me this joke:

chuck norris doesnt believe in germany

?????

Nobody ever answered this so i'll just tell you...chuck norris is considered amazing and unbeatable to people, and therefore he can say/do whatever he wants in jokes, like for example when someone says chuck norris has a night light, not because he is scared of the dark, but because the dark is scared of chuck norris.

Now I have one...why was the chicken in the marching band?

something to do with drum sticks? lol

i like that chuck norris joke its a bit old but will always get a laugh lol

.. heres an even older joke for ya

what do you call a dear with no eyes?

What?

no i dear ( say it phonetically) ~ sounds like no idea ...

Good one. Okay here's mine:

Why don't blondes take birth control pills?

y?

Cause it keeps dropping.

nice lol

what do you call a dear with no eyes and no legs?

What?

Do you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his balls?

Because hair doesn't grow on steel.